15 Life Lessons I Learned by 50 (That I Wouldn’t Have Believed in My 20s)

Here are some lessons I’ve learned during my half century on this planet:

  1. Be kind. The benefits of being kind–or at the very least courteous–far outweigh the effort you put in. Do random acts of kindness. Compliment someone. If a retail or food-service worker makes a mistake, be understanding and patient. Kind people live longer than unkind people.
  2. I know myself better than anyone else. I don’t let anyone else’s opinions control what I do, what I wear, or what I say. Other people’s opinions are suggestions–take them or leave them.
  3. Everyone else is as worried and insecure as you are. Some people just hide it better. It doesn’t mean that they are any smarter or better than you.
  4. Laugh it off. If you make a mistake, fall down, or do something dumb, just laugh it off. Other people (and you) will forget it a lot faster if you just let it roll off your back. EVERYONE makes dumb mistakes. Everyone. You aren’t alone, and you aren’t the biggest idiot in the world. Give yourself a break.
  5. “Fitting in” is highly overrated. Be you. Confidence is sexy. Besides, great leaders didn’t get where they are by following the crowd.
  6. Don’t stay in a bad relationship, even if it’s “for the kids.” Oftentimes, kids really thrive outside the bounds of a toxic relationship.
  7. It’s just stuff. Sure, stuff gets broken–oftentimes accidentally by people you love–and that’s annoying. But your stuff can be replaced. You can never erase the hurtful words you say to the person you love, because they broke your stuff. Stuff is never, ever as important as those you love.
  8. You’re probably a lot smarter than you give yourself credit for being.
  9. Don’t judge. You don’t know all the facts. That lady speeding down the road with her toddler unbuckled in the back seat may be panicked, heading for the hospital for an emergency that you can’t see. That “big kid” having a “tantrum” in the store may be on the autism spectrum, and is having a melt down, which he/she hates as much as you do. The fat lady in the bikini may have lost 100 lbs so far, and she’s pretty darn proud of what she’s done. Don’t shame people for smoking, drinking, or being fat. We all have our faults and bad habits. As a pretty famous guy is alleged to have said, “let he who is without sin cast the first stone.”
  10. Never lose your inner child. Dance. Sing. Skip. Tell poop jokes (not to strangers, though). Go down the slide. Bounce at the bouncy house, if the attendant says adults are welcome. This is an advantage to being older. When you’re 20, people often think you’re “too old” to do these things, but when a 50-something does them, it’s charming. And if people think it’s dumb, screw them. See #2 above.
  11. Don’t make major life decisions to please other people. Maybe your parents expect you to go to college, but you just want to go to trade school and become an auto mechanic, because that’s where your heart is. Or maybe (as in my case) your parents don’t want you to go to college, but you really want to be an attorney. Live life for YOU. The world needs good auto mechanics and good attorneys. It’ll all work out.
  12. Don’t beat yourself up about stuff. Do what you can to fix your mistakes, then move on. Guilt is only good for pushing you toward making things right again. After that, it becomes shame, and shame is a toxic substance which will eat you up inside. Same for worry.
  13. Enjoy life. Literally, stop to smell and admire the flowers. Wonder. Smile at strangers and see how many you can get to smile back. Have fun.
  14. Life goes by really, really fast. Live each day so that, at the end, you’re reveling in how amazing your life was, not regretting all the things you did or didn’t do.
  15. Life is better after 50.



Suicide note with no date.

Why there is so much hatred? because I’m just as good as castrated, but even worse…
In all rationale it seems that sexuality is completely omitted from my life at this stage, I do not recognize my gender, I do not want to have any sexual activity and even when I do I am never satisfied, therefore it is not even worth the effort to consider it the best I can do is avoid the urges and hope that as I get older the less I want it or to otherwise simply surgically remove it altogether.
The life of a circumcised male (where the procedure effectively delivered it’s intended damage) is a being that has no capability of sexual or emotional empathy a hollowed good for nothing do-it species similar to a mule (it does not reproduce, it is obedient, and it has capability of achieving self-characterization because it’s very purpose of life is taken away).
So why do we exist? why have I not killed myself yet?
there’s a simple answer to that, because I’m still serving someone… like a parent, or close friends. but in some moments I do have this realization the moment I don’t have someone else to live for…. I cannot live for myself… I seek no reason I simply await my death to relieve me from suffering.
This isn’t poetry, this isn’t some fan-fiction writing, it is more of a suicide note without an expiration date. should I ever die.. you will know that my life was taken away the moment I was sexually mutilated. what am I now is but a walking corpse of nothing.
I know many of you may find this morbid, But I also know many of you may find themselves in this situation…
What is the purpose of life? is to enjoy it and live it to the fullest, that is what I will never attain, that is what non of the circumcised males will ever attain.
The horrible thing about this world that a majority of circumcised men seek to compensate with their sexual disability by violence, ignorance, justification to circumcise others, and until all circumcised men realize and confront their fears, this havoc will go on running.
What was once a salve mark, a rape-punishment, and later a sacrifice to Satan (A Jewish god). has now become a serious epidemic of misery, the spread of hatred, the reason for wars, and a political statement by the Zionist order, to mark their rule over your most sacred territory, that you are not the owner of your body, sex, or soul. this is property of Zion.
That’s why I want to die.

NSFW – Scientifically backed up document on circumcission

This is the second in a series of informational essays by Marilyn Milos, RN, founder of the National Organization of Circumcision Information Resource Centers and a pioneer in the movement to end the forced circumcision of boys in the United States. Marilyn is also a member of Intact America’s Steering Committee. If you have a question you’d like Marilyn to address, send us an email!

Despite the popular myth that the foreskin (or prepuce) is “just a flap of skin,” it is actually a complex structure that plays a significant role in both penile protection and sensual/sexual enjoyment. Identified by Canadian anatomist Dr. John R. Taylor, the ridged band encircling the inner layer of the foreskin, has 12 to 14 ridges and tens of thousands of specialized erogenous nerves that let a man know what his penis is feeling and where he is in relation to the ejaculatory threshold. When the foreskin is retracted, the main part of the ridged band lies across the top and sides of the shaft of the penis.

Stretching of the accordion-like ridged band triggers important sexual reflexes and erogenous sensation. Without it, men complain of premature ejaculation because they lack nerves to tell the brain specifically what the penis is feeling. CJ Fallier wrote in 1970, “The fundamental biological sexual act becomes, for the circumcised male, simply a satisfaction of an urge and not the refined sensory experience it was meant to be.”

The ridged band is contiguous with the frenulum, a sensitive mucosal membrane on the underside of the penis that attaches the foreskin to the glans (head of the penis). After retraction, the penile frenulum pulls the foreskin back to its forward position, covering and protecting the glans penis and urinary meatus (opening). When a male has been circumcised, whatever remains of the frenular tissue becomes the most sensitive part of his penis.

Structurally, the penis is highly integrated and, according to Dr. Taylor, “The glans, foreskin, and skin of the penile shaft function as a single unit, not as a collection of separate parts with entirely different functions. The functions of the glans and foreskin are similar, and overlapping, but come fully into their own at different times during intercourse.”

—Marilyn Milos, RN

For more information about the foreskin, please download our Foreskin Facts information sheet and share it with your friends, doctors, and anyone you know who may have a baby on the way or is thinking about becoming a parent.

Mood control

Moods change depending on the environment and that can be anything from smell. Colors. Sounds. Tastes and food

And in turn the brain has a part responsible for our self-defense that releases commands in forms of pheromones.
Those pheromones help us decide if something is pretty or ugly. Disgusting or delicious. Good for us or bad for us.

Based on that another part of the brain carries out an emotional response such as repulsion anger hate aggressiveness and so on.

To control those mood changes you do not need external medicine as our medieval science suggests.

You simply need to expose yourself to countering agents. To relieve stress you can smell lavender or listen to calm music or water

To amplify thinking yo can listen to violin and muted drums. A good balance will give you the right amount of adrenalin with another pheromone that triggers curiosity.

Music is a science on its own.

Be sure that no matter what medical field states its a money-making lie.
There is no bipolar. There is no ADHD.

Those errors happen when you force the brain to work the way it’s not supposed to do… like school peer-pressure.

Relax and listen to your brain it knows better than what other monkeys think they know about it…   Pay attention to yourself first, your actions; It will help you become a better version of yourself.

Admiting pain | Circumcision

Click to view image, (Warning, very graphic)

In response to a listener who couldn’t bare the horror… @Blahtherapy

I also studied the psychological impact and I fully expect you to deny me.

because the alternative is to admit the horror..
your mind will fully fight with all excuses possible to justify your condition.. it’s how our minds work..

My dying wish.. is for barbarism to stop, for people to stop raping. suicide bombing, for greed to disappear and for human species to unite.. I have a wish so huge so impossible to achieve within my lifetime.

but if I had the power to be reborn and be spared.. and know that my body belongs to me.

I would give anything ANYTHING to have that.


I lost everything in my life once.. I was a kid.
I was poor.

and I thought to myself “nobody will enslave me”..

that I belong to myself and that was my power..
imagine when I found out. that I was abused before I even knew it.

At age 13 I realized.. my life was a lie.

In my heart I did not believe it..

that god would be wrong and man would be right.

Everything I heard about it felt illogical and unjustified. I was always analytic. I was raised to think this is why we are given brains.

….  Chat disconnected …

For people inerested in circumcision news and death tolls

please visit http://www.cirp.org/news/

Website also has an amazingly accurate illustration guide of a functional mechanics of intercourse (adult content 18+)




A Look Inside The Male Mind

“Submitted with written permission by the author of this brilliant piece of research”

By Stuart Schneiderman

If there’s one thing every woman needs to know about, it’s the inner workings of the male mind. When a woman is involved in a relationship with a man, or if she wishes to be, knowing how his mind works is essential.

Hopefully, she has already learned– not the hard way– that his mind does not work the way hers does.

Where should she start? I recommend that she start by understanding male pride.

Men take pride in their accomplishments but only in those accomplishments that are fitting for a man. A man will take pride in a good golf game or a promotion. He might be sensitive and supportive but he will never take pride in those qualities. Praising him for qualities that he does not see as manly will get a woman nowhere.

When it comes to women, men take pride in their ability to protect and provide.

That is where men live. A woman who ignores it or disparages it will soon discover that her relationship is on life support. Often, she will not even understand why. Unfortunately, the culture does not teach women to respect male pride. More often it teaches them to trample on it. If a woman respects her man’s pride, it will become her friend… kind, caring, and considerate. If she fails to respect his pride, it will become her worst enemy.

The culture tells women that they should proclaim their independence and autonomy, thus, that they do not need men to protect or provide for them. Yet, when a woman tells a man that she does not want him to be her protector or provider, he hears that she believes him to be inadequate. The message is insulting, demeaning to his manhood.

Their relationship, such as it might be, has gotten off to exactly the wrong start.

Worse yet, the male mind will attempt to interpret the independence/autonomy message and will start asking himself what she really wants from him. The woman is thinking that her independence will make her more loveable and will make it possible for him to love her for herself alone. She thinks she is offering love and will receive true love in return. Anyone who thinks this way has obviously never had a successful relationship with a man.

A man will mull it over and conclude that she just wants him for sex. Given that he does not want to offend her or to disrespect her, he might decide that the only thing she is going to get from him is sex. Given that he feels insulted and demeaned, a certain amount of hostility will inexorably creep into his sexual encounters.

Of course, there are other tried and true ways to mishandle a man’s pride.

High on the list is competitiveness. When a man takes pride in his achievements, a girlfriend should share his pride and express her own pride in him. A competitive woman will not revel in his achievements, but will respond to his success by asserting the value of her own accomplishments. These may be very real, but when a woman presents herself as a competitor, she is denying that she is a partner. She is not telling her man that they are together; she is saying that they are at odds. At least, that is how a man will process the information.

Other women misread the male mind by feeling that they must help men to improve themselves by offering what is called constructive criticism. No man will hear such criticism as constructive. He does not need his wife or girlfriend to tell him what he is doing wrong. He probably knows it already, and even if he does not, he does not want to hear it from her. The more he hears it from her the more he will be unable to change… because he must maintain his male pride. If his woman criticizes him, she is highlighting his flaws, faults, and failings. No man want his partner to see him as flawed. More so if he has had a run of bad fortune.

Here is the nub of the matter. How should a woman deal with the broken pride of a man who is down on his luck, who has lost his job, and who cannot provide as well as he used to?

Therapists have made such a fetish of empathy that they might well recommend that a woman should offer a dose of warm and womanly feeling. She should show love, sympathy, compassion, and empathy. The male mind, however, will understand that she is taking pity on him. And he will despise her for pitying him. Pity means that she has lost faith in him, and no man wants his wife or girlfriend to lose faith in him.

Instead, a woman whose man has, for example, lost his job, should express loyalty and confidence.

He wants to know that she will stick with him, that he is not in it alone. That means that he has to know that she is loyal. Confidence means that she believes in him, still thinks that he is her hero, and that if the world does not see it that way, then the world is wrong. It’s not a question of what a woman has or has not achieved on her own. A man needs to know that he is his woman’s hero. And, I promise you, if a woman does not let her man know that he is her hero, then, some other woman, somewhere, somehow, will make him feel like he is hers.

At that point, all the love compassion, empathy, and great sex are not going to put the relationship back together again.

Circumcision in my life

Writing the title of this post alone is already painful but I have to share this to ease my pain.

As with any male in Jordan I was born with a Muslim father who wanted to cut my penis at the later age of 5.. however my mother persisted that the unbearable pain and the surgical psychological impact would be too great to bare at that age.. so my father decided to have me circumcised at first week after birth.

I don’t have any memory of the surgery what so ever, but I remember my early experience in the age of 4 and up..

the head was constantly painful, was inflamed, and itchy. I knew something was wrong, but I couldn’t ever presume someone cut my dick!

at age of 6 the reactions stopped, and I was ok till age 13… I reached puberty then and took my first steps in discovering sexual science.

arguing with my parents was totally useless, they won’t admit they are wrong, and even claimed lies that I had some kind of infectious disease…

My medical record doesn’t say that thou… and I know god very well enough that he blessed me with great gifts of knowing…

I was 15 when I become advanced in Sexology and gynaecology knowledge. I have understood that I’m not a male, I was denied being me since the day I was born.

my knowledge brought me to that psychological impact of being circumcised…

Then I learned is all true. that I will never know what intimate sexual intercourse is, and what is male climax, it’s the same when you’re a female and you had your clitoris burnt with a cigarette to become numb for life. except that you only know discover you’re mutilated purposefully and most painfully by your very own parents.

Circumcision prevented me as a man to have my own natural lubricate..which the glans is supposed to produce during sexual intercourse.

at the age of 17 I went to Ukraine.. so to speak for every arab is the “pussy heaven” guess what was my out come. I went to make music. and followed my passion and never had even dated.

Now why would a male say no to sex ?  figured I’m not attracted to females, neither I’m into senseless humping…

I remained untouched, returning to Jordan with later regret.. but it wasn’t full regret at least I saved myself from the embarrassment.

I don’t think about the 90% dick cut males walking the earth, I think about the fact that I can’t please a female…

my study however proved that Circumcised males are preferred by females due to their longer coming time, and harsher sexual stimulation.. this happens because the penis is almost 80% less sensitive than it should be cause the male to be rougher and stroke harder to stimulate the glens..

while this is better pleasure for female it’s a psychological torture for male because if he doesn’t come, or his erection stops  he feels male-less.

males tend to have a powerful bond to their pride, and when they fail at the mission they are supposed to be born with, psychologically they castrate themselves.

and their hypochondriac state causes impotency so they resort to medications and artificial ways.

the female side also has damage, a male can get very rough in attempt to reach his “limited” climax that he would hurt her.

there were countless reports of such incidents.

The last uncommon symptom is sterility… caused by males who get a sever paranoia state and either castrate themselves, or involve in act of masochism.

that may accidentally result in temporary or permanent sterility. I have personally observed these symptoms occurring across Jordan.

and I have no doubt that general male weakness in the world is caused by psychological impact of circumcision and female’s dominant positions.

I’ve studied Sexology for over 8 years now and about a year in gynaecology… and I’m still studying to find a cure.

I believe the only best cure it to prevent it from happening in the first place…

the current foreskin restoration surgery causes bigger problem than it solves.

the penis glans  doesn’t recover from its defected state. so it’s useless. more over the surgery’s side effect of pulling the skin back causes of erection pain leading to dysfunction preventing full erection in some cases due to insufficient skin tissue.

note also that a restored foreskin doesn’t fold and unfold the exact same way as a native foreskin muscle does.

the existence of this surgery is a living proof  result of the psychological impact circumcision does. but heck doctors make money on it. so the more dicks get cut.. the richer doctors will be doing it.. and the richer will be doctors who attempt further mutilation procedures.

I would embrace a brain tumor. and blood cancer.. but not the fact of intentionally inflected permanent mutilation.

the real reasons why circumcision is encouraged are:

– Female pleasure rumor,    males tend to do what pleases females by nature

– Money making,  you will not believe how much.  ( about 40% of world’s financial wealth )

– Sexual drive reduction, is they say will decrease rape-cases;  hello ( it increases pedophilia and sadism/masochism acts ).

– Slavery,  during my study I encountered cases where genital psychological trauma greatly lessens male’s stubborn, bravery, and life-esteem.. which makes them easier to manipulate by both opposite sex, and government.

relative social side effects are simply votes of ( stop circumcision ) on Facebook.. which the government can give no shit about it.

males won’t riot about it, males won’t stand against it what they know they can’t retrieve. ( why fight a lost cause, perspective )

In the other hand female circumcision, there are 2 methods I have specialized studying in so far.

1 – Cutting part of clitoris

2 – cutting part of Lebia-minora ( aka vaginal lips )

The first method is worse than male circumcision in terms of psychological impact, and also reduces sexual-stimulation by 98%. basically turning a woman into a baby factory chicken.

The side-effects are pretty much similar to male circumcision as far to my knowledge.. however it is less common in the world since females psyche isn’t as much dependent on their sexual state; which helps them fight against it and consider it barbaric. ( after all cutting a clitoris off is worse than exposing a glans to natural damage ).

the second method mostly practiced in Africa till nowadays, is less of a female deprivation and more of a torture.

hinders female’s sexual-stimulation ability severely…

Nowadays you will find most conflicts happening between couples are caused on sexual-displeasure bases.

Origin of Circumcision..

You can read more about it in Wikipedia for technicality because here I will express my sole opinion that may not be entirely detailed or correct..

In my belief it all began when males started fighting over females.. and females fought over males..  this brought a general idea of “SEX is evil and bad”

At this point humans used their over-smarted brains thinking of how to prevent conflicts (which are even till now caused because of sex.. nowadays biggest source of pleasure is money… but no castrated male would say I want to be rich… believe me I talked to eunuchs world-wide they enjoy their senseless purposeless existence, because if frees them from modern world life )

Sex-based conflicts never decreased since it’s in our nature to be tempted by opposite sex… the principal of loyalty even now is still uncommon and mostly used for covering the truth, or pride..

“Sex is evil and bad” drove religions to approve this… soon sex become human’s hardest type of fasting ( act of resisting instincts such as food, sex, and sleeping ).

In attempt to force their own will humans resorted to acts of masochism and sadism inflecting damage to their sexual organs to help their ( way to reach god believing god is asexual being )

This soon became a practice.. along with male castration in catholic churches, and gharems ( pedophile whore houses in where they castrate male boys at pre-mature age to traffic them for sexual pleasure by adult males.. was most famous in the “slave and sex trafficking all around the Muslim world” ).

PS: The Prophet Mohammad allowed that.


Anyways I believe its time we evolve our brains in order to prove ourselves better than monkeys.

so far monkeys are better than us in terms of loyalty. and  genital mutilation prevention..

I have personal believes that the castration and sterilization of animals also began as sadistic-joy… later to be approved by general public.

they resorted to excuses. such as “the tiger was at rage.. we needed to calm him down..”  =__= ARE YOU SERIOUS!!!

To be honest All animals are dying around us…  it is not enough that we are alone on earth.. we still kill what we have left.

once there are no animals.. humans will resort to racism and discrimination.. and kill each other.

….  sometimes I wish we never existed, because we’re god’s failed experiment who resulted more damage than progress.

I might release ( Human as species article one day )  -__-

Hope you enjoyed reading.. maybe it will help a few people if we start thinking better than monkeys..

start by quitting your computer addiction and smoking  🙂